Quotes to remember~

As I was browsing some magazines, I came across a handful of quotes worth re-quoting...

To be a woman, you have to look like a girl, act like a lady, think like a man and work like a dog.

Courtesy is owed. Respect is earned. Love is given. 

It doesn't matter the price of the dress; what matters is what's in the dress.

Mistakes are a fact of life. It's what you learn from them that counts.

Three little words all women long to hear, "You were right."

Good manners will often take you where neither money nor education can. 

A real southern girl will own an iced tea pitcher, a deviled egg plate and have a jar of bacon grease in the fridge.

Not sure about you, but I see some truths here!!

 Have a blessed day :)

Making Peace with Your Housework

I've not been blogging much. There's so much out there to read, I figure I should invest my time in the things in my home that only I can do. Things only I can do, like train our children, manage our home, plan hospitality and so much more! That is the calling of us women, to do and be "So much more..."

Often, that calling drags on us. We are stressed and worried. Tired and hurried. I want to encourage you to LET IT GO! God had given us wonderful things that only WE can do. Whether you are a stay at home mom, a working (outside the home and at home) mom, a single mom, a mom of one or  a mom of 10, there are things only YOU can do.  Don't forget those precious things.

Hugs, kisses, kind words, encouragement, cuddles, stories read, a little money given to a grateful teen, a day out together, a long talk while actually looking at one another and not being in a hurry, and so much more is awaiting you! 

And, what about those things that are drudgery to you?? Laundry, dishes, meals, cleaning, shopping...they must be done. Why not work together? If that is not possible, as sometimes here everyone else is busy with their own things, do them with joy. And, if you are a born again Christian, you are serving your Lord. He knows where he put you, he knows what you have to do. Do it for Him! Surrender and be at peace. 

"Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with all thy might..." 

Ecc. 9:10

"And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as unto the Lord, and not unto men;" Col. 3:23

I once asked my husband, "What can I do that would really matter to you?" You would never, never guess his answer. It was, "Have clean socks in my drawer." Really?! I can do that.  Now, honestly, there have been times when he is not happy with me and I'm thinking, "What is your problem? You have clean socks in your drawer." :) But really, you get the point. The little things matter. Some people speak the love language of "acts of service." Some people speak "quality time." Some "physical touch." There are a few more in a book called The 5 Love Languages . Good things to know! If you're speaking one language and your family members another, well I say again, it's just good stuff to know.

There is so much available to us. We have the virtual world, the real world, and our world. Then we have God's perspective and His world. Live there. It has the best view. Serve by doing those things only you can do. When you're comfortable and have a handle on those, branch out to serve others outside your home. You will feel more peace and be more centered than if you let a schedule run you.

This is such a simple principle, yet so many are missing it and drowning in dissatisfaction in their homes. The home is meant to be a place of peace and refreshment, not of dreary toil. Sometimes we are at a place where we need help indeed, but sometimes it's our attitudes and perspectives that need the most help.

Blessings,

Heather

What's for dinner? "Chewing on the hard things..."

God often gives us things to "chew on."  Sometimes they come through His word, sometimes they come through the mouths of others. Do we take those criticisms, corrections, and commands and begin to chew on them and try to "swallow"?  Or do we simply spit them out?

He renewed that thought in me this morning while drying my hair...odd timing. His timing is like that- the still, small voice when we're allowing quietness in our lives, or when it sneaks in. When we are too full of ourselves, our agenda and busyness, God is crowded out. Oh, he is still there, but he can not teach and help our spirits the way he can when we diligently seek time with him. Soon our surroundings will influence us more than God's Words to us.

So, back to "chewing". I remember hearing people say something smart and end with, "Chew on that a while!" I suppose most of you have heard that term. Often, things are said to us that are hurtful. Either it's the thing that was said, or the way it was said, or both. But, often what we fail to realize that there is typically some truth in most things we do not want to hear! We need to be humble enough to take the meat off and spit out the bones, so to speak. Take what is said and try to make it useful for us! This, my friend, will make you grow! And, as for those rude people who tell us things poorly and hurt our feelings. Just love them anyway. Doing otherwise won't make you feel any better, though you may want avoid placing yourself  in the middle of a food fight with them!

The Little Stranger ~

I am thankful for LIFE, LOVE, PRAYER, FORGIVENESS, GRACE, PEOPLE, CHILDREN, BEAUTY, FOOD, a HOME, and every opportunity to make a difference! Life is good!!
** Yesterday, I was coming out of our small town (604 population) pharmacy and a little hunched over woman leading a old blind woman were walking toward me, crossing the street. I was zipping past on my quest to get home, when the plain little woman said, "You have a nice Thanksgiving, ma'am." Whoa! Smack. Am I too busy? Too focused on my day? She made me smile, as I wished her the same.

 ·  · about a minute ago

Look familiar? Facebook. This was my Facebook post for the day. That woman really had an impact on me. She was small, plain and humble. She was most likely poor. Many in our area are. Yet, she left a mark on me with just a few kind words. Oh, that I could do that every chance I get.

We are getting into the holiday season. People are more warm and fuzzy. But are they really? Or is it that the holidays give them something acceptable to say, where at other times they would be at a loss for kind words? Kindness begets kindness, oftentimes. And when it doesn't...let your kindness be the last thing that old grump remembers.

We are such a blessed people, even in the midst of the messes we create or in the midst of circumstances, we are still very blessed. We should be sharing our blessings, encouraging others to do the same by our example. That little lady was an example to me yesterday.

Often God uses people like her. She is not all puff and fluff. Not adorned, not dressed fashionably. Though those are not bad things, they can distract us from our character. They can cause me to compare myself to others. There will always be someone more beautiful, better dressed and with a nicer home or car. Someone with a better job. But, that's not where it's at. It's in the heart of man that matters are settled.

If we focused on the things that matter more than things, we could see our relationships thriving. I heard news yesterday of a divorce. It always breaks my heart. Times get hard. Don't turn against your friends, your family, your spouse. Encourage, lift up one another, don't be easily offended. We never know what someone else is going through.

Well, I could go on and on...It's Thanksgiving! I am so thankful for the grace of God that gives me strength when I am weak. I am thankful to know his salvation, and have a changed heart.

²⁵Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men; and the weakness of God is stronger than men.

 ²⁶For ye see your calling, brethren, how that not many wise men after the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, are called:

 ²⁷But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty;

 ²⁸And base things of the world, and things which are despised, hath God chosen, yea, and things which are not, to bring to nought things that are:

 ²⁹That no flesh should glory in his presence.

 ³⁰But of him are ye in Christ Jesus, who of God is made unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption:

 ³¹That, according as it is written, He that glorieth, let him glory in the Lord.

1 Corinthians 1 

Emotions~ Part II

Yesterday, the main focus of my thoughts was loosing control of our emotions. Through the analogy of water, I talked about how our emotions can look. Especially, when look when we loose control of the bad emotions that well up inside us. Bad emotions like bitterness, anger, envy, unforgiveness, frustration, fear, and there are probably a few others.

For me, my best avenue of dealing with these is first, to take every thought captive. Thoughts can be controlled. But it is not easy. Think of it like a being on a diet. You want to eat the cake, but you choose the apple. You think something bad about someone, but you choose to redirect your thought to finding something good about that person. Oh, it's no easier that choosing the apple, believe me. But it can save your relationships, and save you from being a sour puss.

Thankfulness, contentment and love are other weapons against bad emotions. God tells us in his Word to be thankful, to be content, to love one another. Those are also choices. They are rich vitamins. Colorful and full of vitality. They make our bodies and minds healthy. Choose to find something to be thankful about in a bad situation. Maybe a job loss is a heavy burden and you're tempted to get bitter. You could be thankful for the opportunity to try something new. (When someone fires you or you're laid off, I believe you can have schooling for a new career paid for... now, that's a bright spot.)

A story I often remember, and a turning point in my life, was when I had been asked to decorate for a special occasion at our church. I was excited and going through ideas; this was my first time doing it! That morning, before heading to the church, I was at piano lessons with our oldest. I got the call that my step dad had passed away suddenly. I was talking to my mom, crying and very much a mess inside. After lessons, we went to the church to look at decorations in the storage. I was greeted by the woman who made it her job to tell everyone what they were going to do, and she let me know it was not my job to decorate, but hers. She did not like me, and was usually rude to me. This was happening now?! Deep breath. For a moment, in the midst of her tirade about it not being my job, I wanted to let her have it. And I don't mean the job.

I walked away. I prayed for wisdom. I left calmly. On the drive home, I realized that this might just be a test. How would I handle it? How could I handle it? I called her home, and left her a message something like this,  "Hi ______, this is Heather. I was thinking you can do the decorating. My step dad passed away this morning and I have a lot on my mind right now, so maybe it would be better if you did handle it. Thank you."

And you know what, the next time I saw her, she apologized. Shocked me! This was out of character. And she wanted me to decorate. I didn't. I had given it up already in my mind and I was settled with it. It was all okay. No hard feelings. And that was nice. Plus it gave me a strong memory of how things can turn out when we handle them the right way. I will never forget it.

So, all that to say, what rules your day is your choice, just like what you eat. We don't realize all those bad choices we make add up to an unhealthy body and an unhealthy mind. We can rid ourselves of much stress and even bad health buy choosing wisely. God bless your emotional choices!

There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.

1 Corinthian 10-13

Emotions~ An Analogy.

I got on the computer at 2:30 this morning. Yes, a.m. We all experience times of laying in bed in the middle of the night with our thoughts getting the best of us, and doing us no good whatsoever. 

Tonight that was me. 

I woke, pondering the hurt I am trying to get over. You know how it is,  you should forgive, and you really seem like you have, but things just won't go away. It is not settled. 

Emotions. 

Wow.

A small word with a whallop. 

wal·lop/ˈwäləp/

Verb:

Strike or hit (someone or something) very hard: "they walloped the back of his head".

Yep. They can feel just like that. 

I am visual, so here is  what healthy emotions look like to me... 

Joy shining,

 Laughter rippling,

Even in the midst of a cold day.

Peaceful. 

Colorful. 

Drawing others into your scene.

 Inviting.

That's the ideal.

But then, someone is unkind, unthoughtful, rude, selfish,

 or worse 

...and things get to churning. 

Emotions. 

Sometimes they're slow;  you feel a wave coming. 

You try to sort it out. 

Sometimes, they're like going over a waterfall.  Swoosh! And you're gone.

(and some body's gonna get it.) 

The problem with second one is when you go over the waterfall, you take others with you. 

You may swim to shore and dry off after the fall.

 But you may just leave others on the shore gasping for breath. 

You go on your way, not looking back. 

People do that sometimes. 

Not very pretty is it?

This was me yesterday. 

This was me last night. 

This will be me today. Because I will not be ruled by emotions.
I can choose to forgive. 


Just remember, when someone forgives, it does not mean they forget. A person may not remember each offence, but they will remember to be careful with their heart. To enable total forgetting, trust needs to be restored. 


Chances are if you've taken someone over a waterfall, they will be a lot less likely to get back in the boat with you!! 


At least not without one foot on the land.

Piles and Praise

Good morning world. It's with a period today. Not and exclamation mark. Flat and sober. I'm just not really feeling it, you know? The sun is shining, the leaves are beautiful, the kids are healthy, the husband is in a good mood, and me... Blah. I have been on my knees this morning. Still... Blah. Prayer did help, but the heaviness remains.

We're like that sometimes. Everything is good around us, not perfect by any means, but good.  Life has been piling up and we feel we are under the pile instead of on top of it. Despite the troubles, there are still things to be thankful for. Seldom can we not find some things, many things actually, to be thankful for. But, like me this morning, we can get drug down. I can forget to look around and take the time to notice all the good things. Or I may notice, but not do anything about it.

Typing this, I remember the best remedy of all. Guess what? It's not Prozac. It is PRAISE. Praising God. When we lift him up, we are pulled along. I can't explain it. I can't explain gravity either. But it works. So, before the men get back from moving the cattle, and before we all  pile in the Suburban to go on a road trip I've been looking forward to for weeks...I am going to start praising God. And I plan to praise Him all the day, whenever I see the beautiful colors, when I look at my children, when I look at my husband, when we sit down to eat our ham sandwiches at lunch and every opportunity I can find I will praise the Lord.

I hope you will remember to do the same when you feel that your are under the pile instead of being on top of it!

Let every thing that hath breath praise the LORD. Praise ye the LORD.

Psalms 150:6

Hair Cuts and Habits

Today, I'm going to get a hair cut. This will be the first one I've had this year, I believe. Well, the first one by someone who knows what they're doing. I cut my own hair because I know how I want it, and I can figure out about where to aim the scissors. It's not that hard, probably because I'm good at making do.


The first thing I do when I walk in is make small talk, warming up to her. The second thing I do, almost always, is apologize. I have too. I have made her job incredibly hard my lack of motivation to go see her more often.


Don't we do that? We make others' work more difficult by our lack of motivation. We just don't feel like doing it. It will get done sooner or later. Sometimes the "thing" just goes away. (At least we think it does.) But most of the time, our laziness- lack of motivation- affects others. Some things are small, but small things build. The beach is made of small grains of sand, you know.  We need to remember to say we're sorry for the little things and that most everything we do affects someone. Little things like our negative attitudes, our habit of running late, and even silly things, like jokes made at some one's expense. And making more work for others.


Do I really feel bad about not getting a hair cut sooner? Not really. But I will apologize. Haircuts are like vacuuming. You can let it go, and still takes about the same amount of effort to get the job done. Well, at least I hope she sees it that way! And, she is getting paid to fix it. Thankfully I don't have to pay my family to put up all the others things I do!